A Journey of Love, Loss, and Resilience
Moses and Blessing Innocent, a young couple from Adamawa State in Nigeria, have faced unimaginable challenges on their journey to parenthood. Within a single year, they endured two C-sections, two pregnancy losses, and the heartbreak of two burials. Through it all, their faith, mutual support, and commitment to one another have carried them. In this interview, they share their experiences, lessons learned, and healing journey.
Background and Profession
Innocent Moses, a chartered accountant working with an engineering firm in Lagos, is also a faith-based thought leader. He shares personal experiences on relationships, life, and challenges, hoping to inspire young people to learn, grow, and make better choices. Their story is part of what he shares, with the hope that it will teach and comfort others.
The Season of Loss
The couple described a season of unexpected heartbreak. When the first loss happened, they were devastated. Months later, when his wife conceived again, their hearts were full of hope. But despite medical procedures and their faith, they faced another heartbreaking loss. The experience was overwhelming, watching the woman he loved endure pain twice within such a short period.
Marriage and the Timeline of Events
They have been married for three and a half years, tying the knot in 2021. Both pregnancies were carried to term. For the first baby, complications arose during delivery, and they lost the child. The doctors did everything possible; medically, nothing was left undone. They had to accept it as God’s plan. The second pregnancy progressed normally, and the baby was born alive and crying, but sadly, 24 hours later, they lost the baby.
Emotional Challenges
The most difficult part of watching his wife go through this physically and emotionally was taking her home without their baby after the first loss, and then repeating the same heartbreak months later. Even though he had to stay strong for her, it was the most emotionally draining experience of his life. Watching her undergo surgeries, recover, and bear such grief was devastating.
Faith and Strength
Initially, Innocent didn’t want to hear anyone talk about God. He needed space to process the pain and speak to Him directly. Over time, God brought him peace and reminded him of His faithfulness. Faith strengthened him, gave him patience, and allowed him to support his wife genuinely.
Strength wasn’t about hiding his pain. He allowed himself to feel everything, cry when he needed to, and express his emotions honestly. Strength was being present, empathetic, and supportive of his wife while still processing his own grief.
Private Moments of Resilience
The quiet moments at home, holding hands, crying together, praying, watching films, and singing were crucial. They helped them breathe, reminded them that they weren’t alone, and strengthened their bond.
Lessons on Marriage and Love
Marriage isn’t only about the sweet moments. There are challenges no one prepares you for. True partnership means facing adversity together, understanding each other’s pain, and supporting one another even when it’s difficult. Love proved itself not in what they had but in how they endured the hardships.
Honoring the Memory of Their Children
They honor their children intentionally by talking about them, keeping photos from pregnancy and hospital moments, and remembering them in their prayers. They named them even before they were born. Their memory is part of their story, and they consider it a shared parenting journey with God.
Advice for Other Fathers
People will criticize and judge, especially online. But your intentions matter most. Allow people to talk; forgive yourself if you feel you made mistakes. Be present for your wife; she carried the physical and emotional burden. Healing comes from shared presence, compassion, and love. Your wife’s peace and happiness give you strength.
Hope and Healing
Hope comes from faith and from watching his wife endure with courage. He believes the future holds blessings they cannot yet see. Grief is part of their story, but so are resilience, love, and the belief that brighter days lie ahead.
The Wife’s Perspective
Blessing Innocent, a student and businesswoman, shared her perspective. She didn’t feel like she had a choice; life simply demanded it. Over time, she realized that courage isn’t about feeling strong, it’s about choosing to keep going even when you’re breaking inside.
Emotionally Challenging Moments
Leaving the hospital without a child, not once, but twice, was the most emotionally challenging part of the journey. She had undergone two surgeries, risked her life twice, and still returned home empty-handed. Seeing her stomach still shaped like pregnancy while having nothing inside was crushing.
Understanding Motherhood
Motherhood is sacrifice, courage, and a willingness to put your life on the line for another. Some people criticized her husband for allowing her to undergo two C-sections in a year, but it was her decision. She wanted the chance to carry and hold her children.
Role of Faith
Faith was everything. She held on to the belief that all things, even the painful moments, work together for good. There were days she questioned why, but faith reminded her that healing comes in God’s timing.
Healing Behind Closed Doors
Her husband was her anchor. When she broke down, he comforted her. He listened, held her, and took on responsibilities so she could rest. Those private moments, when no one else was watching, defined her healing.
Dealing with Negativity
She chose not to dwell on negativity. She intentionally focused on the prayers, the encouragement, and the people who genuinely cared. Blocking out negativity was essential for her emotional and mental well-being.
Lessons on Love and Unity
It brought them closer than she ever imagined. They became a team against grief and against life’s unpredictability. If a couple is united, there is no hardship they cannot face.
Finding Hope
She has learned not to set timelines for blessings. She does her best each day, trusting that the future is in God’s hands. The hope that she will hold her children one day sustains her.
Gratitude and Support
She is grateful for life, her own and that of her husband. She is thankful that she survived two surgeries without complications. She appreciates the support from family and friends and the grace that carried her through the darkest moments.
Support from Family and Friends
Their support was unwavering. Her mother and sister left their homes to stay with them. They cooked, cleaned, cared for her, and provided emotional support. Friends offered prayers and words of encouragement. Their support was invaluable.
